Fearless on my breath...

Bigotry in the advice column, a DKos diarist posts this blurb from their local paper's equivalent of "Dear Abby":

Apology might help ease tension in neighborhood

Dear Amy: My husband and I have lived in our quiet suburban Denver neighborhood for six years.

About two years ago two young gay men moved in across the street. They've taken the ugliest, most run-down property in the neighborhood and remodeled and transformed it into the pride of the street.

When it snows, they shovel out my car and are friendly, yet they mostly keep to themselves.

Last month I went out to retrieve my newspaper and watched them kiss each other goodbye and embrace as they each left for work.

I was appalled that they would do something like that in plain view of everyone.

I was so disturbed that I spoke to my pastor. He encouraged me to draft a letter telling them how much we appreciate their help but asking them to refrain from that behavior in our neighborhood.

I did so and asked a few of our neighbors to sign it.

Since I delivered it, I've not been able to get them to even engage me in conversation.

I offer greetings but they've chosen to ignore me.

They have made it so uncomfortable for the other neighbors and me by not even acknowledging our presence.

How would you suggest we open communications with them and explain to them that we value their contributions to the neighborhood but will not tolerate watching unnatural and disturbing behavior.

-- Wondering

Here's Amy's response:

Dear Wondering: You're lucky that these gentlemen merely choose to ignore you.

Your neighbors could respond to your hospitality by hosting weekly outdoor "gay pride" barbecues and inviting all of their friends to enjoy life on your quiet suburban street.

I can hold out hope that they will choose to do this, but I'm spiteful in that way. Your neighbors sound much more kind.

In your original petition to these men, you basically stated that while you value them when they are raising the standard on your street and shoveling your driveway, you loathe them for being who they are.

The only way to open communication with your neighbors would be to start by apologizing to them for engaging your other neighbors in your campaign. Because you don't sound likely to apologize, you are just going to have to tolerate being ignored.

Here's my response:
Dear Wondering,

If I'd had the great karmic misfortune to share a geographical location with you for any period of time and you'd knocked on my doorstep with such a document in hand one of two things would've happened:

1) I'd have showered you with tiny bits of said document to the point that you'd be finding errant papery bits upon your person for the next few weeks.
or
2) I'd have rolled up said document, told you where you could insert it, how far, and at what angle.

Then I would've told you to never darken my doorstep again in this or any future lifetime, you brainless, bigoted boob. My only comfort in all of this is the certainty that in your next life you will undoubtedly begin again at the nematoad level. Enjoy the muck, you've earned it.

via Steve Gilliard's News Blog