(no subject)

Well I got laundry done last night but precious little else. The apartment is at least livable for Aelf's stay tonight and that's going to have to be good enough I think.

Got some more writing done, 17,100+ words so far and I might be nearing the halfway point...maybe. However, my goal of finishing it this month seems rather absurd. Ah well, it was a nice dream while it lasted.

Pye has discovered a way to get inside my boxspring and thinks this is the coolest thing ever. Especially at 3 in the morning. *sigh*

And tersa, no samples yet, did you get yours? Even if it arrives tonight I don't think there's any way I can get it started thanks to class, so I'll have to start it tomorrow night and play with it on Saturday I think. Do we need to do the actual ordering by this weekend? I should think so.

( Very brief Lost comments... )

So what would you ask?

Bill O'Reilly is asking folks to come on his show and debate him, presumably because actual guests are getting scarce and he figures some of his yahoo viewers will kill airtime for no other reason than to say they were on t.v. My dream guest would, of course, be Stephen Colbert who spent the entire time mock earnestly trying to be the perfect sycophant while simultaneously skewering the man.

Here's what Bill's site has to say about the contest:

The Great "Factor" Debate contest is underway and here's the deal:

During the month of February six lucky "Factor" viewers will be flown to New York City or Los Angeles (depending on which city we're broadcasting from) with hotel and meals paid for by us.

All you have to do is convince us by e-mail (and later by telephone) that you are a good debater and that you can hold your own with O'Reilly on a topic of your choosing.

Good luck!

s.z. over at World o' Crap has come up with her questions already:

Loofahs vs. wash clothes: which is better for getting a woman's nipples really hard?

My personal view is that falafel doesn't belong in a shower.

Here's another topic idea:

Vibrators: Does every woman own a vibrator? What about men? And where do men place theirs? Which kind of vibrator is best? What do you think of the ones that are shaped like a cock -- are they better than the "rabbit" ones made famous by "Sex and the City"? Do YOU own a vibrator, Mr. O'Reilly? What did you name it? I bet it's named "Roger."

My personal view on this topic is that one shouldn't discuss it with one's subordinates.

Oh, here's a serious topic suggestion:

War in our Time: We all know about the War on Christmas (and the equally serious, but less well known War on the Easter Bunny). But what about the War on Groundhog Day? Shouldn't we all be up in arms over the way the ACLU, the secularists, the New York Times, and the Jews are trying to strip this holiday of its religious origins? Shouldn't we boycott all merchants who don't mention the Virgin Mary's ritual purification, and the Christ child's presentation in the temple (and Proserpine's seasonal escape from the Underworld) in their holiday advertising? And aren't people of faith being persecuted if shop girls fail to wish them a "Blessed Groundhog Day" during this holiday period (which officially begins on Boxing Day)? What do you have against groundhogs, Mr. O'Reilly?

My personal view on this topic is that declaring that there's a war on a holiday is the sign of a desperate media personality who feels slighted because Roger Ailes will no longer take his calls, and who knows that his wife is sleeping with the pool man. Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Her commentors have suggested a few other good ones:

How about "Why Polk Awards Are So Much Better Than Peabody Awards, Dammit, There's Not Even That Much Difference Between Them, So Shut Up." And then I laugh at him for 12 minutes or until I become hoarse.
Charlotte Smith

This is such an interesting challenge. Would I have the lack of integrity and the ability to lie-on-the-fly to make up enough phony sources such as the Paris Business Review to back up my baseless assertions? Could I blithely invent a volume, issue number, page number, author and institutional affiliation while simultaneoulsly willing my face not to turn the beet-red it would from a degree of egregious mendacity it is in no way used to?

No. I don't think so. In a liars contest, O'Reilly wins, all the time.
Mal de mer

So if you had a chance to debate Mr. O'Reilly, what would you ask? Remember, you've got a 100 word limit.