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Aug. 16th, 2007 05:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ebonlockSurfacing briefly because this had to be shared:
Now, in my freest of moments and at the height of procrastination, I sometimes like to imagine the National Review—and occasionally, all of wingnuttia—as a gurgling, twisted Hogwarts. This mainly happens when I spend extended periods reading around over there and realize just what a magically disconnected place wingnuttia is. So I think it’s time we*** got around to placing those outside the reality-based community (I’m a proud Muggle) into their proper houses. I know what you’re thinking: they’re all fucking Slytherins! That may be true, but it would ruin my premise. Allow me then to first dispatch the obvious.
Jonah Goldberg: the Doughy Pantload, chickenhawk par excellence, needed extra time to produce 200 pages of abject stupidity about Hegel and Wholefoods, which will debut on the NYT’s worst-seller list (which will itself debut for Goldberg’s book). Hufflepuff.
Kathryn Jean Lopez: I feel one could argue in any number of directions here. K-Lo’s distinguishing characteristic is her crushes on all the BMOC, which to my mind lines her up with Ravenclaw’s Cho Chang. It helps that Ravenclaw is essentially a repository for the non-white denizens of the magical realm; however, K-Lo’s resemblance to Grimace, along with her intellectual wispiness, suggests Hufflepuff. In the end though, I think Ravenclaw has her.
John Derbyshire: As far as I can recall, the Sorting Hat has nothing to say about criminal insanity. But I feel like Hogwarts in Derb’s era was probably a vastly different place, maybe even home to a slew of imperialists whose personal credo was “rubble don’t make trouble.” Even Albus Dumbledore flirted briefly with colonizing Muggles! Call me crazy, but I think Derb sports red & gold.
Mark Steyn: Slytherin. Slytherin, Slytherin, Slytherin.
Ramesh Ponnuru: the Sorting Hat knew immediately that Ramesh belongs in Ravenclaw, and even foresaw that he would spend his entire Hogwarts career advocating for Slytherin, and even that the Slytherins would find him distasteful.
Ann Althouse: Psych! Althouse is a Squib.
Now, in my freest of moments and at the height of procrastination, I sometimes like to imagine the National Review—and occasionally, all of wingnuttia—as a gurgling, twisted Hogwarts. This mainly happens when I spend extended periods reading around over there and realize just what a magically disconnected place wingnuttia is. So I think it’s time we*** got around to placing those outside the reality-based community (I’m a proud Muggle) into their proper houses. I know what you’re thinking: they’re all fucking Slytherins! That may be true, but it would ruin my premise. Allow me then to first dispatch the obvious.
Jonah Goldberg: the Doughy Pantload, chickenhawk par excellence, needed extra time to produce 200 pages of abject stupidity about Hegel and Wholefoods, which will debut on the NYT’s worst-seller list (which will itself debut for Goldberg’s book). Hufflepuff.
Kathryn Jean Lopez: I feel one could argue in any number of directions here. K-Lo’s distinguishing characteristic is her crushes on all the BMOC, which to my mind lines her up with Ravenclaw’s Cho Chang. It helps that Ravenclaw is essentially a repository for the non-white denizens of the magical realm; however, K-Lo’s resemblance to Grimace, along with her intellectual wispiness, suggests Hufflepuff. In the end though, I think Ravenclaw has her.
John Derbyshire: As far as I can recall, the Sorting Hat has nothing to say about criminal insanity. But I feel like Hogwarts in Derb’s era was probably a vastly different place, maybe even home to a slew of imperialists whose personal credo was “rubble don’t make trouble.” Even Albus Dumbledore flirted briefly with colonizing Muggles! Call me crazy, but I think Derb sports red & gold.
Mark Steyn: Slytherin. Slytherin, Slytherin, Slytherin.
Ramesh Ponnuru: the Sorting Hat knew immediately that Ramesh belongs in Ravenclaw, and even foresaw that he would spend his entire Hogwarts career advocating for Slytherin, and even that the Slytherins would find him distasteful.
Ann Althouse: Psych! Althouse is a Squib.
