A disaster beyond your imagination....
Dec. 29th, 2004 09:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ebonlockOk, first let me start with something positive that happened today. I stopped at PetSmart and picked up some new toys for Pye. Because god knows if there's one thing the cat needs it's more toys. I got him an oversized rattle mousey mostly because I'm dying to see him try and shove it under the fridge. Currently he's tossing it in the air and letting it thump and rattle to the floor. He's been playing for a good 20 minutes straight. Heh. Of course I may not be so pleased when I awake to said thump-rattle at 3 in the morning.
I met up with the movie viewing gang (![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
eilonwey, xleste, silkblade and S-'s sister and husband) and we sat around chatting and trying to psyche ourselves down for the film. Hey, the lower the expectations the less of a chance of disappointment, right? Well, we had to hope.
Let me begin by saying that I am a Phantom snob. I've been one for years, and I've collected everything from the show. I've got recording from around the world, I've seen the show well over two dozen times and in every major city I've ever visited that it was playing in. I've met several of the stars, chatted with Colm Wilkinson, been taken on a tour of the stage and backstage, seen every film version of it ever made, and of course, visited the actual Opera Populaire (which I considered doing my masters thesis on in grad school). Suffice to say, hardcore fangirl when it comes to this show. If you know nothing of it, have never seen it and have no emotional attachment to it, your opinion of the film may differ drastically from my own. You have been warned.
The film started late, then the projectionist screwed up the very beginning, an ominous start to be sure. But I must admit I kind of liked the start of the film. The grainy black and white version of 1919 Paris and the auction sequence were nicely done. The burst of organ music and return of the chandelier and theater to its former glory were, well, dazzling. I couldn't help grinning and even got a bit goose pimply in spite of my doubts. I can't help it, I'm such a sucker for this show.
Hannibal was...interesting in a "WTF are they doing?" kind of way. The costumes were pretty awful, though compared to the makeup they weren't too bad. The dancing girls' costumes were rather lame, but I'm prejudiced having made one of the stage costumes myself. Everything just looked kind of flimsy and washed out, instead of sumptuous and gorgeous. But, again, I'm prejudiced so take that with a grain of salt.
However, the scene did introduce what I believe was a major Schumacher theme. Gold body paint. Seriously, they must've gone through gallons of it in the making of this movie. I imagine the director walking around the set and declaring, "Paint them gold!" in much the same way as the Queen of Hearts demanding peoples' heads. Well, I guess it beats codpieces and nipples, and given his work on the Batman series...let's just say I was really dreading seeing the Red Death costume.
Andre and Firmin were, um, ok, though vocally weak. Thank goodness someone had the sense to dub Minnie Driver as Carlotta. She was fun enough as the spoiled diva, not great, but watchable. The Raoul was properly cute and vacuous (double digit IQ on that boy, just as it should be) with a decent enough voice. The Christine...well, she's not the worst I've ever heard (that honor belongs to Dale "the chipmunk" Kristien), though I thought her voice better suited to a Disney film. But, ok, everyone looked pretty good, and I loved Miranda Richardson as Madame Giry. Oh and the Meg was a bit of a hottie. So far so good.
Christine goes on to explain how the Angel of Music has been visiting her since she was 7. My brain immediately goes, "Oh Erik...ewwww." That's not romantic or sexy, that's just weird and disturbing. Bad Mr. Schumacher, bad!
Everything was going pretty well (though the libretto changes were playing with my head) until the Phantom is introduced. Allow me to pause here and clue ALW and Mr. Schumacher in to a little something. Apparently they were unaware that there are, in fact, people who are trained to both act and sing and have proven themselves capable of performing this role. Here, gentlemen, you will find a list of people who should have been much higher on the list to play the Phantom than Gerard Butler. Indeed, I can safely say at this point that I would've preferred a first year theater student to Mr. Butler. Hell, he made me pine for Robert Guillaume (the last Phantom that really couldn't fucking sing), because even he might've done a superior job. Dude, David Gaines, good looking and a killer voice who knows his way around the role? What the hell?
"Phantom of the Opera" was painful, I winced a lot, but I knew the true pain was coming. Oh yes, it was coming. I lowered my head tosilkblade's shoulder and moaned as Mr. Butler desecrated what for me is a religious hymn, "Music of the Night". He did hit "soar" and "be", but I suspect there was more than a little behind the scenes technical wizardry going on there. I did have to give props to the musical director who had to suffer his way through this man's clear inability to adequately sing the role and wisely tended to blast the music nice and loud to cover up the actor's sad performance. Not quite loud enough for my taste, but, hey. I thought back to the char women in an earlier sequence stuffing their ears with cotton to avoid Carlotta's screeching. I knew I'd forgotten to bring something with me.
"Stranger Than You Dreamt It" made me bury my face in my hands, another favorite moment completely botched. Though,xleste leaning over and whispering, "Hey, he took off Christine's stockings!" almost eased the pain. "Notes" was ok, though, weirdly chopped up yet again, and I must admit I did enjoy "Prima Donna", even if I missed the staging in the theatrical version. I just love Andre and Firmin exchanging the "Who'd believe a diva happy to relieve a chorus girl who's gone and slept with her patron?" bit as they turn Carlotta around in her chair and she obliviously caterwauls on. Hey, whatever, I can cope with that change easily enough.
More odd libretto changes and musical bridges that made me furrow my brow with confusion. Another flash forward to 1919 for no reason that I could conceive of. Mmm-kay. On the plus side it gave me an excuse to marvel over their Opera Populaire set. Very pretty indeed, I must admit.
"Il Muto" was pretty good, and thankfully they removed most of Erik's gloating down to "Did I not instruct that box five was to be kept empty?", and all of the laughing. Thank you merciful editors, thank you. And no chandelier drop, but Erik stalking Buquet was kind of creepy. Well, until Gerard started looking rather goofy and playing with his cape. I should add that Mr. Butler had only one cape trick which he used...repeatedly. Buquet totally had it coming, chasing after Erik like that. Silly Buquet.
The rooftop sequence and "All I Ask of You" were ok, but I have no particular love for that sequence anyway. I was amused to note that with the film staging the Phantom ended up crouching behind a horse's ass throughout the song. Was this a subtle visual metaphor or was I reading too much into it? Hmmmm. "I Gave You My Music" was deep, deep hurting, but it could've been worse. Again, they cut out all the laughing that Butler would only have mangled anyway so better to do without it. I did kind of like the cgi work on his cape as he ascended Apollo's Lyre, that was kind of a nice visual.
"Masquerade" was rather pathetic. Apparently Schumacher was just determined to suck all the color out of the film and removed all the classic, colorful and imaginative costumes replacing them with rather dull and lifeless ones. Of course there were also half naked people painted gold. Why? Why not, right Mr. Schumacher? And of course new lyrics all around as, again, no new chandelier was needed. Fine, fine, whatever. Also I'm quite sure some of the back up dancers were voguing. You know, like the Madonna video. I had no idea people did that back in the 1800's.
At odd intervals during this sequence I'm quite certain that Schumacher ordered the cameramen to back away so that wild, crack-addled monkeys could take over the filming. Things would be going along quite normally and then suddenly the camera's veering all over the place and I'm suddenly wondering if someone slipped some LSD into my bottled water. WTF?
The Red Death costume could have been worse. If I just keep repeating that often enough I should come to believe it. I have to say, though, that the Phantom being dressed almost entirely in open frilly shirts that showed off his physique was a bit distracting. If they'd included saxophones in the soundtrack it might well have been a sad 70's porno version of the story. The costume did show us that Mr. Butler is..ahem..packing. Or perhaps that was the classic Schumacher codpiece making a belated appearance after all.
One confusing element occurred during his "Your chains are still mine..." bit where he ends up swiping Raoul's engagement ring from around Christine's neck. More on that later. Then we got some of the "Notes" reprise mixed in rather oddly and Erik gets all pokey with his big shiney blade. Raoul runs off to get his own pokey, but of course Erik disappears before he can make use of it. Twit. Though we do get the inclusion of the maze of mirrors, a nice nod to the original story, even if it is brief.
We get the Madame Giry flashback version of Erik's story, his time in a cage being treated like an animal in a freak show. He kills his owner and Giry helps him escape into the bowels of the Opera House. The only things he takes with him are his sack mask and a little fabric monkey he's somehow fashioned because he's a GENIUS. Mmm, monkey.
Um, skipping ahead, Christine manages a Wonder Woman-esque costume change from nighty to bosomy, inappropriate mourning dress to go visit dear old dad in the cemetary. I always wondered how a poor musician could afford such a nice crypt, and why he might not have used the money to, you know, support his kid instead. Whatever.
Erik starts his totally unbelievable hyponotism routine on Christine and of course Raoul shows up and spoils everything. I did kind of wish they'd put Raoul's lines back in as it would've at least reduced the Butler squawking a little. And then out went the fireballs and instead we got a bizarro sword fight with lots of cape swishing (dear god) and Raoul winning. Oh right, as if! Butler manages a passable, "I KEEL YOU!" look as Christine drags Raoul off and they ride his horsey back to the Opera, or wherever, by this point I just couldn't bring myself to care.
Skipping ahead again, Don Juan Triumphant has apparently been turned into a post-modern piece with some truly experimental staging. But the best, and I do mean the best part of all had to be the Don Juan Triumphant Improvisational Dancers! Sweet merciful baby Jesus but I doubled over laughing at the inexplicable addition of some of the worst dancing I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. Erik decides not to bother with a disguise during "Point of No Return" which confuses the audience members familiar with the production. Um, so he's going out on a stage to perform in his own opera where armed men are ready to shoot him because he's just that cocky. Sure, why not? Christine either starts to fall under the spell of his singing or has decided to turn the tables on him and seduce him (I like this rationalization better myself, it gives Christine a bit of chutzpah). Then Erik gives Christine back Raoul's ring with his own proposal. Mmm-hmm. She rips off his mask (again) and it's revealed that he is...well...mildly unattractive. Seriously, nothing a little makeup and the right lighting couldn't take care of. But oh, the horror, the horror! This brilliant, rich, otherwise hot guy who, admittedly has some anger management problems, is just too terrifying for words. *sigh* Right.
The Phantom then makes off with Christine by jumping through this flamey prop and we get to see London, France and Christine Daae's underpants.
Raoul chases after her forgetting, as per usual, to keep his damn hand at the level of his damn eyes! C'mon, man, it's not that tough. He then tumbles into a trap and nearly gets drowned, I do like all the traps Erik has set up for the unwary, again, nice nod to the original novel. He escapes, but not in time to save us from still more of Mr. Butler's pathetic attempts at song. I was praying, actually praying, that they'd let him just speak some of the lines rather than croak them out, but sadly, no, he had to sing the entire lair sequence. Woe unto the audience.
The scene seems to go on forever, and I can't help thinking I would've been a bit more forgiving of Mr. Butler's performance if he'd attempted to, well, act in the role rather than simply chew the scenery. Wasn't that the reason they hired an ACTOR rather than a theatrical performer? I thought that was the reasoning anyway. Aside from that I'd have to blame the decision on drugs. Lots and lots of drugs.
Suffice to say Christine shares a totally passionless kiss with Erik who, of course, lets her go with the Twit and Butler manages once again to fail completely in inspiring any emotion in the audience whatsoever. I have seen and heard Phantoms reduce entire audiences to sniveling wrecks with a simple, heartfelt, "Christine, I love you..." All Butler inspired was a sincere sigh of relief that finally it was over. Christine doubles back and gives Erik the ring back...only it's Raoul's ring and if I were him I'd be PISSED, but whatever. Erik either releases some tension by breaking all of his mirrors, or he's forgotten where he put the damned secret escape exit. He finally locates it and leaves before the mob arrives, Meg finds the mask, and Ellie thinks, "Right, time to go!"
Silly Ellie, there's a bit more. Flash back to 1919 again and Raoul's at Christine's grave where he tenderly places the monkey music box and notices a single red rose with the same ring attached to it. So apparently Erik made it to a doddering old age too. I briefly paused to imagine the two bumping into each other as old men and attempting to duke it out once more. It allowed me a bit of a giggle as the credits rolled and the hideous Minnie Driver pop tune/Oscar contender for best song in a motion picture began. Fortunately everyone had had more than enough by that point and we all fled the theater to run outside and bitch to our hearts' content.
After dinner I practically ran to my car to blast the Michael Crawford/Sarah Brightman version as loud as I could on the way home. Ahhhh, yes, that's what it's supposed to sound like. *happy sigh*
To sum up my reaction to Mr. Butler in the title role of Phantom I would like to borrow a paragraph fromnamaah_darling's review of Paul Walker in "Timeline":
And he could not act dead if you bashed his brains out with a surfboard. Through the whole course of the movie, he did not manage to successfully convey a single emotion, though he provoked several: loathing, annoyance, disgust, irritation, confusion, scorn, and maniacal laughter. Yes. I know that last is not an emotion. But you get the point.
That about sums it up. Add to that the fact that the MAN CAN'T SING EVEN A LITTLE. Seriously, *I* could do a better job in the role if for no other reason than I've heard it done properly and know which phrasing works and where the emphasis belongs. I suspect that I may buy the film when it comes out on DVD if only to mute it and play my London cast performance while it plays. It could also be fun if we created a drinking game to go along with it and MST'd it mercilessly. But, if you value your hearing, I beseech you to avoid this film as if it were a rabid dog.
I met up with the movie viewing gang (
eilonwey, xleste, silkblade and S-'s sister and husband) and we sat around chatting and trying to psyche ourselves down for the film. Hey, the lower the expectations the less of a chance of disappointment, right? Well, we had to hope.Let me begin by saying that I am a Phantom snob. I've been one for years, and I've collected everything from the show. I've got recording from around the world, I've seen the show well over two dozen times and in every major city I've ever visited that it was playing in. I've met several of the stars, chatted with Colm Wilkinson, been taken on a tour of the stage and backstage, seen every film version of it ever made, and of course, visited the actual Opera Populaire (which I considered doing my masters thesis on in grad school). Suffice to say, hardcore fangirl when it comes to this show. If you know nothing of it, have never seen it and have no emotional attachment to it, your opinion of the film may differ drastically from my own. You have been warned.
The film started late, then the projectionist screwed up the very beginning, an ominous start to be sure. But I must admit I kind of liked the start of the film. The grainy black and white version of 1919 Paris and the auction sequence were nicely done. The burst of organ music and return of the chandelier and theater to its former glory were, well, dazzling. I couldn't help grinning and even got a bit goose pimply in spite of my doubts. I can't help it, I'm such a sucker for this show.
Hannibal was...interesting in a "WTF are they doing?" kind of way. The costumes were pretty awful, though compared to the makeup they weren't too bad. The dancing girls' costumes were rather lame, but I'm prejudiced having made one of the stage costumes myself. Everything just looked kind of flimsy and washed out, instead of sumptuous and gorgeous. But, again, I'm prejudiced so take that with a grain of salt.
However, the scene did introduce what I believe was a major Schumacher theme. Gold body paint. Seriously, they must've gone through gallons of it in the making of this movie. I imagine the director walking around the set and declaring, "Paint them gold!" in much the same way as the Queen of Hearts demanding peoples' heads. Well, I guess it beats codpieces and nipples, and given his work on the Batman series...let's just say I was really dreading seeing the Red Death costume.
Andre and Firmin were, um, ok, though vocally weak. Thank goodness someone had the sense to dub Minnie Driver as Carlotta. She was fun enough as the spoiled diva, not great, but watchable. The Raoul was properly cute and vacuous (double digit IQ on that boy, just as it should be) with a decent enough voice. The Christine...well, she's not the worst I've ever heard (that honor belongs to Dale "the chipmunk" Kristien), though I thought her voice better suited to a Disney film. But, ok, everyone looked pretty good, and I loved Miranda Richardson as Madame Giry. Oh and the Meg was a bit of a hottie. So far so good.
Christine goes on to explain how the Angel of Music has been visiting her since she was 7. My brain immediately goes, "Oh Erik...ewwww." That's not romantic or sexy, that's just weird and disturbing. Bad Mr. Schumacher, bad!
Everything was going pretty well (though the libretto changes were playing with my head) until the Phantom is introduced. Allow me to pause here and clue ALW and Mr. Schumacher in to a little something. Apparently they were unaware that there are, in fact, people who are trained to both act and sing and have proven themselves capable of performing this role. Here, gentlemen, you will find a list of people who should have been much higher on the list to play the Phantom than Gerard Butler. Indeed, I can safely say at this point that I would've preferred a first year theater student to Mr. Butler. Hell, he made me pine for Robert Guillaume (the last Phantom that really couldn't fucking sing), because even he might've done a superior job. Dude, David Gaines, good looking and a killer voice who knows his way around the role? What the hell?
"Phantom of the Opera" was painful, I winced a lot, but I knew the true pain was coming. Oh yes, it was coming. I lowered my head to
silkblade's shoulder and moaned as Mr. Butler desecrated what for me is a religious hymn, "Music of the Night". He did hit "soar" and "be", but I suspect there was more than a little behind the scenes technical wizardry going on there. I did have to give props to the musical director who had to suffer his way through this man's clear inability to adequately sing the role and wisely tended to blast the music nice and loud to cover up the actor's sad performance. Not quite loud enough for my taste, but, hey. I thought back to the char women in an earlier sequence stuffing their ears with cotton to avoid Carlotta's screeching. I knew I'd forgotten to bring something with me."Stranger Than You Dreamt It" made me bury my face in my hands, another favorite moment completely botched. Though,
xleste leaning over and whispering, "Hey, he took off Christine's stockings!" almost eased the pain. "Notes" was ok, though, weirdly chopped up yet again, and I must admit I did enjoy "Prima Donna", even if I missed the staging in the theatrical version. I just love Andre and Firmin exchanging the "Who'd believe a diva happy to relieve a chorus girl who's gone and slept with her patron?" bit as they turn Carlotta around in her chair and she obliviously caterwauls on. Hey, whatever, I can cope with that change easily enough.More odd libretto changes and musical bridges that made me furrow my brow with confusion. Another flash forward to 1919 for no reason that I could conceive of. Mmm-kay. On the plus side it gave me an excuse to marvel over their Opera Populaire set. Very pretty indeed, I must admit.
"Il Muto" was pretty good, and thankfully they removed most of Erik's gloating down to "Did I not instruct that box five was to be kept empty?", and all of the laughing. Thank you merciful editors, thank you. And no chandelier drop, but Erik stalking Buquet was kind of creepy. Well, until Gerard started looking rather goofy and playing with his cape. I should add that Mr. Butler had only one cape trick which he used...repeatedly. Buquet totally had it coming, chasing after Erik like that. Silly Buquet.
The rooftop sequence and "All I Ask of You" were ok, but I have no particular love for that sequence anyway. I was amused to note that with the film staging the Phantom ended up crouching behind a horse's ass throughout the song. Was this a subtle visual metaphor or was I reading too much into it? Hmmmm. "I Gave You My Music" was deep, deep hurting, but it could've been worse. Again, they cut out all the laughing that Butler would only have mangled anyway so better to do without it. I did kind of like the cgi work on his cape as he ascended Apollo's Lyre, that was kind of a nice visual.
"Masquerade" was rather pathetic. Apparently Schumacher was just determined to suck all the color out of the film and removed all the classic, colorful and imaginative costumes replacing them with rather dull and lifeless ones. Of course there were also half naked people painted gold. Why? Why not, right Mr. Schumacher? And of course new lyrics all around as, again, no new chandelier was needed. Fine, fine, whatever. Also I'm quite sure some of the back up dancers were voguing. You know, like the Madonna video. I had no idea people did that back in the 1800's.
At odd intervals during this sequence I'm quite certain that Schumacher ordered the cameramen to back away so that wild, crack-addled monkeys could take over the filming. Things would be going along quite normally and then suddenly the camera's veering all over the place and I'm suddenly wondering if someone slipped some LSD into my bottled water. WTF?
The Red Death costume could have been worse. If I just keep repeating that often enough I should come to believe it. I have to say, though, that the Phantom being dressed almost entirely in open frilly shirts that showed off his physique was a bit distracting. If they'd included saxophones in the soundtrack it might well have been a sad 70's porno version of the story. The costume did show us that Mr. Butler is..ahem..packing. Or perhaps that was the classic Schumacher codpiece making a belated appearance after all.
One confusing element occurred during his "Your chains are still mine..." bit where he ends up swiping Raoul's engagement ring from around Christine's neck. More on that later. Then we got some of the "Notes" reprise mixed in rather oddly and Erik gets all pokey with his big shiney blade. Raoul runs off to get his own pokey, but of course Erik disappears before he can make use of it. Twit. Though we do get the inclusion of the maze of mirrors, a nice nod to the original story, even if it is brief.
We get the Madame Giry flashback version of Erik's story, his time in a cage being treated like an animal in a freak show. He kills his owner and Giry helps him escape into the bowels of the Opera House. The only things he takes with him are his sack mask and a little fabric monkey he's somehow fashioned because he's a GENIUS. Mmm, monkey.
Um, skipping ahead, Christine manages a Wonder Woman-esque costume change from nighty to bosomy, inappropriate mourning dress to go visit dear old dad in the cemetary. I always wondered how a poor musician could afford such a nice crypt, and why he might not have used the money to, you know, support his kid instead. Whatever.
Erik starts his totally unbelievable hyponotism routine on Christine and of course Raoul shows up and spoils everything. I did kind of wish they'd put Raoul's lines back in as it would've at least reduced the Butler squawking a little. And then out went the fireballs and instead we got a bizarro sword fight with lots of cape swishing (dear god) and Raoul winning. Oh right, as if! Butler manages a passable, "I KEEL YOU!" look as Christine drags Raoul off and they ride his horsey back to the Opera, or wherever, by this point I just couldn't bring myself to care.
Skipping ahead again, Don Juan Triumphant has apparently been turned into a post-modern piece with some truly experimental staging. But the best, and I do mean the best part of all had to be the Don Juan Triumphant Improvisational Dancers! Sweet merciful baby Jesus but I doubled over laughing at the inexplicable addition of some of the worst dancing I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. Erik decides not to bother with a disguise during "Point of No Return" which confuses the audience members familiar with the production. Um, so he's going out on a stage to perform in his own opera where armed men are ready to shoot him because he's just that cocky. Sure, why not? Christine either starts to fall under the spell of his singing or has decided to turn the tables on him and seduce him (I like this rationalization better myself, it gives Christine a bit of chutzpah). Then Erik gives Christine back Raoul's ring with his own proposal. Mmm-hmm. She rips off his mask (again) and it's revealed that he is...well...mildly unattractive. Seriously, nothing a little makeup and the right lighting couldn't take care of. But oh, the horror, the horror! This brilliant, rich, otherwise hot guy who, admittedly has some anger management problems, is just too terrifying for words. *sigh* Right.
The Phantom then makes off with Christine by jumping through this flamey prop and we get to see London, France and Christine Daae's underpants.
Raoul chases after her forgetting, as per usual, to keep his damn hand at the level of his damn eyes! C'mon, man, it's not that tough. He then tumbles into a trap and nearly gets drowned, I do like all the traps Erik has set up for the unwary, again, nice nod to the original novel. He escapes, but not in time to save us from still more of Mr. Butler's pathetic attempts at song. I was praying, actually praying, that they'd let him just speak some of the lines rather than croak them out, but sadly, no, he had to sing the entire lair sequence. Woe unto the audience.
The scene seems to go on forever, and I can't help thinking I would've been a bit more forgiving of Mr. Butler's performance if he'd attempted to, well, act in the role rather than simply chew the scenery. Wasn't that the reason they hired an ACTOR rather than a theatrical performer? I thought that was the reasoning anyway. Aside from that I'd have to blame the decision on drugs. Lots and lots of drugs.
Suffice to say Christine shares a totally passionless kiss with Erik who, of course, lets her go with the Twit and Butler manages once again to fail completely in inspiring any emotion in the audience whatsoever. I have seen and heard Phantoms reduce entire audiences to sniveling wrecks with a simple, heartfelt, "Christine, I love you..." All Butler inspired was a sincere sigh of relief that finally it was over. Christine doubles back and gives Erik the ring back...only it's Raoul's ring and if I were him I'd be PISSED, but whatever. Erik either releases some tension by breaking all of his mirrors, or he's forgotten where he put the damned secret escape exit. He finally locates it and leaves before the mob arrives, Meg finds the mask, and Ellie thinks, "Right, time to go!"
Silly Ellie, there's a bit more. Flash back to 1919 again and Raoul's at Christine's grave where he tenderly places the monkey music box and notices a single red rose with the same ring attached to it. So apparently Erik made it to a doddering old age too. I briefly paused to imagine the two bumping into each other as old men and attempting to duke it out once more. It allowed me a bit of a giggle as the credits rolled and the hideous Minnie Driver pop tune/Oscar contender for best song in a motion picture began. Fortunately everyone had had more than enough by that point and we all fled the theater to run outside and bitch to our hearts' content.
After dinner I practically ran to my car to blast the Michael Crawford/Sarah Brightman version as loud as I could on the way home. Ahhhh, yes, that's what it's supposed to sound like. *happy sigh*
To sum up my reaction to Mr. Butler in the title role of Phantom I would like to borrow a paragraph from
namaah_darling's review of Paul Walker in "Timeline":And he could not act dead if you bashed his brains out with a surfboard. Through the whole course of the movie, he did not manage to successfully convey a single emotion, though he provoked several: loathing, annoyance, disgust, irritation, confusion, scorn, and maniacal laughter. Yes. I know that last is not an emotion. But you get the point.
That about sums it up. Add to that the fact that the MAN CAN'T SING EVEN A LITTLE. Seriously, *I* could do a better job in the role if for no other reason than I've heard it done properly and know which phrasing works and where the emphasis belongs. I suspect that I may buy the film when it comes out on DVD if only to mute it and play my London cast performance while it plays. It could also be fun if we created a drinking game to go along with it and MST'd it mercilessly. But, if you value your hearing, I beseech you to avoid this film as if it were a rabid dog.
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Date: 2004-12-31 02:28 am (UTC)About the movie, I guess the less said the better. :) I liked the book.