Adventures on Craphole Island
Dec. 1st, 2004 08:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ebonlockOh my god the Brian Williams interview on the Daily Show rocked so very, very much. I actually couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard and the Tucker Carlson comment broke even Jon, which is damned hard to do. My hat's off to you Mr. Williams!
Claire, you are one freaky chick but your dreams are kinda cool. So was Locke flipping through Tarot cards or was it just my imagination? The funny thing is that the black eyes really don't make Locke any creepier. You have got to admire that in a character.
Oooh here we go with the flashbacks, and sure enough this wasn't exactly an expected pregnancy. Thomas seems kinda cool, an artist even, sweet! Claire spoiled rich girl? Now that I wasn't expecting, and possibly disowned, also quite interesting.
Ah look, yet more Kate and Jack flirtation. Jesus Fucking Christ will you two please have SEX?! *whimper* Sayid is mentioned but we have yet to see if he's escaped the mystery jungle of doom and the giant invisible creature. Can we please get back to him? Please? Pretty please? With sugar on top?
Charlie relates a dream involving missing teeth, a bus, and the scent of bacon over a cuppa with Claire. One wonders if this might have anything to do with the heroin. Oh my god, he's cuter than teddy bears. He could totally do my hair, any day, any time. Suddenly the Prince song, "If I Was Your Girlfriend" is playing through my brain. Of course this is reinforcing my Charlie is gay and should so totally hook up with Jack theory. Yes, I'm sick and should be stopped.
Flashback-o-rama, takes Claire to a psychic who knows she's pregnant. Say, he's good. Uh-oh, he's got that "You're going to be in a plane crash and end up on a crazy tropical island with a bunch of good looking men and a giant invisible creature" look in his eyes. Oh yeah, he's good all right. Of course he throws her out before actually relating anything helpful like, "Uh, you might want to postpone any air travel until after the baby's born. Just a suggestion." Why is it that tv psychics never spit out useful stuff like this?
Ok, I know it's been done to death but the Capital One card ravaging horde still amuses me.
So Claire's dreaming about someone stabbing her? I think I see some knife flashy-ness. Oh, guess it was a "needle" then? Hugo Reyes?! Aww, Hurley, he's bein' all sensible and practial again. This guy should become the first official mayor of Mystery Island. OMG, Charlie is way cooler than teddy bears and kittens. He's all protective and sweet and we loves him!
Uh-oh, Thomas is getting cold feet about the baby. Commitment-phobic much? I would insert a "Oh typical fucking male" comment here, but as much as I hate the fucker Charlie's cancelling that desire out by being a big sweetie.
Um, Charlie, Kate is *so* not the boss of the beach. And settle down, boy, nobody's accusing Claire of being a little cuckoo...except for me, of course. And possibly Sayid when he gets back with his "illness" and "black rock" and "Crazy Frenh Lady" story. Oh, ok, maybe Jack is suggesting she's a little cuckoo and prescribing drugs and now he's chased Claire off. Aww, sad Charlie in cave.
Hey, psychic guy again. Ok, here's your chance, dude, tell her about the plane thing! A blurry thing? Polar bear maybe? The polar bear was definitely blurry...until they shot it anyway. Cue ominous music and heavy breathing from the psychic. Crucial that Claire raise the baby, got it. Danger surrounds the baby? Wait, woah, is this baby the anti-christ? I have got such an Omen feeling from this. Claire's goodness is obviously supposed to cancel something out...but what? Hmmm...
I'm assuming at this point (8:35 to be precise) that she was on her way to LA to have the baby and turn it over to adoptive parents in the US. Which is clearly why she had to end up on Mystery Island, 'cause The Powers that Be want her to raise that baby. Apparently psychic guy has managed to get Claire's number to try to convince her again to RAISE HER BABY OR ELSE! Claire will have none of it, and none of the damn caves either so off she storms to the beach.
Heh, "Craphole Island", ok Snicker Ho just amused me. "Rape Caves", ok, I'm amused again.
Surprise, surprise, Sawyer-not-Sawyer has the flight manifest that would make Hurley's job much easier. Though, does anybody else find it odd that Worst Lifeguard Ever comes up with the idea? The boy's first competent moment, hooray! Hurley lays it out for Sawyer-not-Sawyer about the island point system and S-N-S is actually sensible for a change. Again, Mayor Hurley has a really nice ring to it.
I think I need an icon of Hurley reading "Mayor of Craphole Island"...
Charlie trots after Claire who, admittedly, has a point about the whole white knight thing. Yeah Charlie wants to rescue her, but hey it gives him something to do to take his mind off the smack. He counts seconds in "sugar plun fairies", again, cuter than teddy bears, kittens, and...um...other cute things. Heh, he gets so overly excited he blurts out the whole drug addict thing, which doesn't do much to calm Claire down any. Guess it's not taking his mind off the smack quite as well as I thought.
Flashback-o-rama, Claire tries to sign over rights to the baby but the Fates intercede screaming, "NO Don't do it!" via a non-working series of ink pens. Of course she runs straight back to the psychic guy for advice because he is clearly in touch with said Fates. Back to Charlie scampering, telling random guy to go get Jack which may end up being not the greatest idea in the world. But it gives Charlie a chance to hear the psychic story and start connecting some dots. Yeah psychic guy totally did know you were going to end up on Craphole Island, Claire, he so totally KNEW. Heh, way to go psychic guy. Still, again, it might've been nice if he'd given her a head's up about the polar bears and invisible monsters. I'm just sayin'...
Argh, end of episode already?! No Sayid? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
And dear god if I have to see this fucking Jessica Simpson Xmas special commercial one more time I'm going to have to go on a killing spree.
OMFG Sayid!!! Sayid!!! No, wait, Sayid, go back to Sayid. Yeah, ok, Claire's fine and Charlie continues to be adorable and protective. Fine, whatever. Sayid!!! Oh his leg is all stingy. "We're not alone." No, really? Hurley with the manifest, and we get the revelation that Ethan is...um....serial killer? Part of the French lady's group? One of the alien scientists using the island as a huge laboratory? The devil? At this point I'm open to suggestions. Whatever he is, he's taken Claire and Charlie! If he touches just one hair on Charlie's adorable head... *grr*
Next time, Dr. Jack races to save the day! Ethan kicks his ass in the rain. Can't believe Locke can't settle this asshole's hash in the first 5 minutes with one hand tied behind his back. C'mon, he faced down the giant invisible monster! And Sawyer-not-Sawyer looms threateningly over Sayid. Sayid looks nervous, but Ellie can't help thinking that this would be an excellent start to an amazingly hot Sayid/Sawyer BDSM fic.
Just sayin'...
Claire, you are one freaky chick but your dreams are kinda cool. So was Locke flipping through Tarot cards or was it just my imagination? The funny thing is that the black eyes really don't make Locke any creepier. You have got to admire that in a character.
Oooh here we go with the flashbacks, and sure enough this wasn't exactly an expected pregnancy. Thomas seems kinda cool, an artist even, sweet! Claire spoiled rich girl? Now that I wasn't expecting, and possibly disowned, also quite interesting.
Ah look, yet more Kate and Jack flirtation. Jesus Fucking Christ will you two please have SEX?! *whimper* Sayid is mentioned but we have yet to see if he's escaped the mystery jungle of doom and the giant invisible creature. Can we please get back to him? Please? Pretty please? With sugar on top?
Charlie relates a dream involving missing teeth, a bus, and the scent of bacon over a cuppa with Claire. One wonders if this might have anything to do with the heroin. Oh my god, he's cuter than teddy bears. He could totally do my hair, any day, any time. Suddenly the Prince song, "If I Was Your Girlfriend" is playing through my brain. Of course this is reinforcing my Charlie is gay and should so totally hook up with Jack theory. Yes, I'm sick and should be stopped.
Flashback-o-rama, takes Claire to a psychic who knows she's pregnant. Say, he's good. Uh-oh, he's got that "You're going to be in a plane crash and end up on a crazy tropical island with a bunch of good looking men and a giant invisible creature" look in his eyes. Oh yeah, he's good all right. Of course he throws her out before actually relating anything helpful like, "Uh, you might want to postpone any air travel until after the baby's born. Just a suggestion." Why is it that tv psychics never spit out useful stuff like this?
Ok, I know it's been done to death but the Capital One card ravaging horde still amuses me.
So Claire's dreaming about someone stabbing her? I think I see some knife flashy-ness. Oh, guess it was a "needle" then? Hugo Reyes?! Aww, Hurley, he's bein' all sensible and practial again. This guy should become the first official mayor of Mystery Island. OMG, Charlie is way cooler than teddy bears and kittens. He's all protective and sweet and we loves him!
Uh-oh, Thomas is getting cold feet about the baby. Commitment-phobic much? I would insert a "Oh typical fucking male" comment here, but as much as I hate the fucker Charlie's cancelling that desire out by being a big sweetie.
Um, Charlie, Kate is *so* not the boss of the beach. And settle down, boy, nobody's accusing Claire of being a little cuckoo...except for me, of course. And possibly Sayid when he gets back with his "illness" and "black rock" and "Crazy Frenh Lady" story. Oh, ok, maybe Jack is suggesting she's a little cuckoo and prescribing drugs and now he's chased Claire off. Aww, sad Charlie in cave.
Hey, psychic guy again. Ok, here's your chance, dude, tell her about the plane thing! A blurry thing? Polar bear maybe? The polar bear was definitely blurry...until they shot it anyway. Cue ominous music and heavy breathing from the psychic. Crucial that Claire raise the baby, got it. Danger surrounds the baby? Wait, woah, is this baby the anti-christ? I have got such an Omen feeling from this. Claire's goodness is obviously supposed to cancel something out...but what? Hmmm...
I'm assuming at this point (8:35 to be precise) that she was on her way to LA to have the baby and turn it over to adoptive parents in the US. Which is clearly why she had to end up on Mystery Island, 'cause The Powers that Be want her to raise that baby. Apparently psychic guy has managed to get Claire's number to try to convince her again to RAISE HER BABY OR ELSE! Claire will have none of it, and none of the damn caves either so off she storms to the beach.
Heh, "Craphole Island", ok Snicker Ho just amused me. "Rape Caves", ok, I'm amused again.
Surprise, surprise, Sawyer-not-Sawyer has the flight manifest that would make Hurley's job much easier. Though, does anybody else find it odd that Worst Lifeguard Ever comes up with the idea? The boy's first competent moment, hooray! Hurley lays it out for Sawyer-not-Sawyer about the island point system and S-N-S is actually sensible for a change. Again, Mayor Hurley has a really nice ring to it.
I think I need an icon of Hurley reading "Mayor of Craphole Island"...
Charlie trots after Claire who, admittedly, has a point about the whole white knight thing. Yeah Charlie wants to rescue her, but hey it gives him something to do to take his mind off the smack. He counts seconds in "sugar plun fairies", again, cuter than teddy bears, kittens, and...um...other cute things. Heh, he gets so overly excited he blurts out the whole drug addict thing, which doesn't do much to calm Claire down any. Guess it's not taking his mind off the smack quite as well as I thought.
Flashback-o-rama, Claire tries to sign over rights to the baby but the Fates intercede screaming, "NO Don't do it!" via a non-working series of ink pens. Of course she runs straight back to the psychic guy for advice because he is clearly in touch with said Fates. Back to Charlie scampering, telling random guy to go get Jack which may end up being not the greatest idea in the world. But it gives Charlie a chance to hear the psychic story and start connecting some dots. Yeah psychic guy totally did know you were going to end up on Craphole Island, Claire, he so totally KNEW. Heh, way to go psychic guy. Still, again, it might've been nice if he'd given her a head's up about the polar bears and invisible monsters. I'm just sayin'...
Argh, end of episode already?! No Sayid? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
And dear god if I have to see this fucking Jessica Simpson Xmas special commercial one more time I'm going to have to go on a killing spree.
OMFG Sayid!!! Sayid!!! No, wait, Sayid, go back to Sayid. Yeah, ok, Claire's fine and Charlie continues to be adorable and protective. Fine, whatever. Sayid!!! Oh his leg is all stingy. "We're not alone." No, really? Hurley with the manifest, and we get the revelation that Ethan is...um....serial killer? Part of the French lady's group? One of the alien scientists using the island as a huge laboratory? The devil? At this point I'm open to suggestions. Whatever he is, he's taken Claire and Charlie! If he touches just one hair on Charlie's adorable head... *grr*
Next time, Dr. Jack races to save the day! Ethan kicks his ass in the rain. Can't believe Locke can't settle this asshole's hash in the first 5 minutes with one hand tied behind his back. C'mon, he faced down the giant invisible monster! And Sawyer-not-Sawyer looms threateningly over Sayid. Sayid looks nervous, but Ellie can't help thinking that this would be an excellent start to an amazingly hot Sayid/Sawyer BDSM fic.
Just sayin'...
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 05:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 05:48 am (UTC)And here I was thinking 'Hey, maybe Ethan will touch a hair on Charlie's adorable head and then Charlie will suffer and Ellie will squee.'
no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 07:00 am (UTC)Just sayin'...
No, don't hurt Sayid! And "hot Sayid/Sawyer BDSM" WTF? Just...no. Ick. Now, Sayid/Charlie, light BDSM, that I could appreciate. I may be the only female viewer who finds Sawyer totally physically repulsive.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 04:23 pm (UTC)Yes, sadly, I think you are ;) Seriously, I'll take just about any fic I can get these days but I can totally see a Sayid/Sawyer hate-turns-to-passion kind of deal if it were handled well. Not that I'm offering to do it, mind you.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 04:26 pm (UTC)Well I will growl first, but if it's entertaining torture and Charlie suffers it bravely to protect Claire...well there might be some light squeeing involved.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 04:27 pm (UTC)I think that qualifies you as at least a Bronze-level member of the Pervy Hobbit Fanciers Association. I'll get that membership card out to you ASAP ;)
no subject
Date: 2004-12-02 08:27 pm (UTC)AUGH
Date: 2004-12-07 01:35 am (UTC)First off, I'm VERY GLAD I only have two more nights till new Lost, because there was much wailing and lamentation when it ended last night.
Also felt the whole anti-christ baby thing, can't wait to see where that goes. Good creepy music for that bit, too.
"one-sugar-plum-fairy" is the cutest ever. Ever. As is Charlie.
I still can't believe how thoroughly engaging I find this show. Though the hot men certainly help.