ebonlock: (Brock pissed)
This is just heartbreaking:

Shortly before she died, my grandmother—one of the people, naturally, I loved the most in the world—broke my heart. Celia Perlstein, like most of our grandparents, didn't get out much in her final years; in fact, for the last few years of her life, I'm not sure she got out of her old folks home at all. I don't think she really wanted to. She was sure that beyond its threshold lay dragons: far-far-far leftists out to steal her Social Security; turbaned terrorists just itching to fly a jet into the First Wisconsin tower a few blocks to the south; quisling Democrats itching to help them do it; grandma-gutting criminal marauders just outside her door.

I'd look out of her eighth floor picture window, down at the scene she saw every day, half expecting to find that nightmare landscape before me. Nope: same as always, the brightly colored sailboats on Lake Michigan, kids and their parents feeding the ducks (Grandma used to take me to feed the ducks), happy, strolling Milwaukee couples—paradise. Where was she getting these fantasies?

One evening's visit, all became clear. She gestured at the blaring TV set. The excruciating grandma-volume was even more excruciating than usual, because she was visiting with her best TV friend. She told me how much she adored Bill O'Reilly. My wife and I cringed. Watching our latter-day Joe McCarthy on TV every night, she had learned, late in life—for this development was entirely new—how to hate her fellow Americans. I almost cried, because one of the people she was learning how to hate was me.


Ready to do something about this bullshit? Join then campaign to hold FOX's sponsors accountable for the hate speech they're paying for. This is the kind of thing they're sponsoring, O'Reilly comparing the liberal commentors and diarists at Daily Kos as bad as the Klan and Nazis. Is this really what the advertisers want to be associated with? If so they're going to have to learn that the decision brings with it some serious consequences.
ebonlock: (wtf kara)
Oh Keith Olbermann is going to break something laughing at the latest from Bill O. (a.k.a. The Big Giant Head):

A "national underground network" of pink pistol-packing lesbians is terrorizing America. "All across the country," they are raping young girls, attacking heterosexual males at random, and forcibly indoctrinating children as young as 10 into the homosexual lifestyle, according to a shocking June 21 segment on the popular Fox News Channel program, "The O'Reilly Factor."
Titled "Violent Lesbian Gangs a Growing Problem," the segment began with host Bill O'Reilly briefly referencing for his roughly 3 million viewers the case of Wayne Buckle, a DVD bootlegger who was attacked by seven lesbians in New York City last August. Deploying swift, broad strokes, O'Reilly painted a graphic picture of lesbian gangs running amok. "In Tennessee, authorities say a lesbian gang called GTO, Gays Taking Over, are involved in raping young girls," he reported. "And in Philadelphia, a lesbian gang called DTO, Dykes Taking Over, are allegedly terrorizing people as well."

After this introduction, O'Reilly went to a split-screen live interview with "Fox News crime analyst" Rod Wheeler.

"Tell me what's going on," O'Reilly said.

Wheeler, a Washington, D.C., Metropolitan Police Department officer-turned-paid Fox News commentator, launched right in: "Well, you know, there is this national underground network, if you will, Bill, of women that's lesbians and also some men groups that's actually recruiting kids as young as 10 years old in a lot of the schools in the communities all across the country," he reported. "And they actually carry a number of weapons. And they commit a number of crimes."

Wheeler asserted that "we've actually counted, just in the Washington D.C. area alone, that's Washington D.C., Maryland, and Virginia, well over 150 of these crews. … And they — like I said, they recruit these kids to be members of these gangs."

O'Reilly asked, "Now, when they recruit the kids, are they indoctrinating them into homosexuality?"

"Yes," Wheeler answered. "As a matter of fact, some of the kids have actually reported that they were forced into, you know, performing sex acts and doing sex acts with some of these people."

Flabbergasted by the sheer depravity of it all, O'Reilly nevertheless forged ahead. "I never thought of this," said the host of the "no-spin zone." "It makes sense that, if you had lawless gay people, they would do this kind of thing. You associate homosexuality more with a social movement, not a criminal movement. But you're saying this is all over the country, detective?"

"It's all over the country," Wheeler replied. "I mean, you go from New York to California to wherever you want to name, you can see these organizations." Next came the pink guns. "Now, the other thing, too, that our viewers are going to find very, very interesting, is the fact that they actually carry—some of these groups carry pink pistols," Wheeler said. "They call themselves the pink-pistol-packing group. And these are lesbians that actually carry pistols. That's 9-millimeter Glocks. They use these. They commit crimes, and they cause a lot of hurt to a lot of people."


In the comments, chachabowl responds:

There's an untapped reservoir of movie exploitation material here just ready to burst forth.

Roger Corman, a nation turns it's lonely eyes to you.


So, Bill O'Reilly, victim of an almost child-like credulity or bat-shit crazy? You make the call. Also, if I were studying Freudian psychology I'd have my Master's thesis locked up with this one, no doubt about it.
ebonlock: (colbert)
I'm not sure which I'm looking forward to more, watching Stephen Colbert skewer "Papa Bear" O'Reilly as only he can, or the blowback the Big Giant Head is going to get for this latest gem:

On the January 15 edition of Fox News' The O'Reilly Factor, host Bill O'Reilly said of Shawn Hornbeck -- who was abducted at the age of 11, held for four years, and recently found in Missouri -- that "there was an element here that this kid liked about this circumstances" and that he "do[esn't] buy" "the Stockholm syndrome thing." O'Reilly also said: "The situation here for this kid looks to me to be a lot more fun than what he had under his old parents. He didn't have to go to school. He could run around and do whatever he wanted." When fellow Fox News host Greta Van Susteren pointed out that "[s]ome kids like school," O'Reilly replied: "Well, I don't believe this kid did."

The following day, during his "Talking Points Memo" segment, O'Reilly responded to viewer mail criticizing his comments about Hornbeck. O'Reilly concluded: "I hope he did not make a conscious decision to accept his captivity because" his kidnapper "made things easy for him. No school, play all day long."


Of course what else would one expect from King Falafel? He's been accused of being a sexual predator himself so it's probably partially professional courtesy, and partially his own deep need to believe that victims of this kind of thing secretly enjoy it. Gods I'm kicking myself for not making it home in time for Olbermann's list of Worst Persons in the World last night. I'll bet it was a doozy.
ebonlock: (Colbert Report)
Jesus, Keith Olbermann just keeps bitch slapping Bill O'Reilly, and Falafel Man seems to be starting to enjoy it. Well he must be, it's the only explanation that makes any sense. Bill, Keith continues to verbally paddle your bottom publically every damn time you pull one of your pathetic little stunts, like your current petition to get Keith fired, and you just keep coming back for more. Surely there's a moderately priced and discreet mistress out there who'd be willing to do it for you in private, and they might include some falafel and loofah if you ask nicely.

'Cause dude, it's starting to get embarassing.
ebonlock: (Monarch)
You know, just when I think Bill O'Reilly can't possibly be more of a prick than he already is, He just has to go and prove me wrong:

O'Reilly is literally trying to get Keith Olbermann fired:

February 22, 2006

Chairman Robert Wright
National Broadcasting Company
30 Rockefeller Plaza
New York, New York 10112

Dear Chairman Wright:

We, the undersigned, are becoming increasingly concerned about the well-being of MSNBC and, in particular, note the continuing ratings failure of the program currently airing weeknights on that network at 8:00 PM EST.

It is now apparent to everyone that a grave injustice has been done to the previous host for that time slot, Phil Donahue, whose ratings, at the time of his show's cancellation three years ago, were demonstrably stronger than those of the current host.

Therefore, in an effort to rescue MSNBC from the ratings basement and to restore the honor and dignity of Mr. Donahue, who was ignobly removed as host three years ago, we ask that you immediately bring Phil Donahue's show back at 8:00 PM EST before any more damage is done.

If you would like to express your support for this issue please fill in the information below and press the "Sign the Petition" button. Your signature will be added from the information you provide below. To protect your privacy, your last name will not be displayed on the web site.


Oh Falafel-boy, is your ego really that fragile? Wait..don't answer that.
ebonlock: (Flying Spaghetti Monster)
The fine folks of Madison, Wisconsin respond to Bill O'Reilly's accusation that they commune with Satan:

Bill Lueders of the Isthmus isn’t shy about communing with Satan and seems to nail O’Reilly’s demented thought process, “Actually, I commune with Satan often, and consider him a pal. Not the scary Biblical Satan who eats babies and the like, but the kind of guy who is considered sinister by Bill O'Reilly and friends: You know, the kind who believes that government ought to be on the side of people in need, not people in greed; the kind who supports equality for woman and gay people; the kind who tries to be respectful of religious diversity and not trumpet the "majority" religion. That Satan. Praise be with him.”
[...]
Alder Austin King says O’Reilly has his deities all mixed up, “I happen to know personally that more members of the Madison media commune with Bacchus than with Satan. Same can be said for the Council, and, I should think, our constituents. I did a little of that myself tonight.”

You should check out the rest, though the image at the top was what really cracked me up.

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